Archive for June, 2007

Are you afraid to die?

How tragic can it be to starts the day by receiving a phone call that inform you of someone’s death within 5 minutes arrival in the office? I personally experienced that before and it happened to be one of the worst day in my life. Receiving a death call of someone you loved dearly is a beginning to many bad days ahead albeit the sweet living memory of the person lived on with you, for the rest of your life.

So question of today was, “Are you afraid to die?”.  I do. There’s so many things that I have yet to accomplished. There’s so many things out there that I want to try and experience for myself. There’s so many people to leave behind if I were dead, not to forget the amount of debt (thank’s to New Age Ah Long registered under the disguise called Credit Card) built over the years that can’t be buried with my body six feet under. I don’t want to die, just yet.

I’ve always wonder, what goes to the mind of people who commit suicide. It takes one extreme courage to drink that glass of detergent, to swallow that bottle of Parasetamol, to inhale the cooking gas, to jump from that 20th floor, or to slice your wrist with that blade, but there ain’t no sign of courage to stays alive and face whatever challenge that they may be dealing with at the edge of their surviving desire. Can one be so irrational to the point of taking his own life just like the sudden shopping urge to get that LV bag there and then? I still don’t get it.

There is so much in life that you can savour from. Why mourn over one or two bumps that results in only seconds of uncomfortable ride along your life long journey. Take a deep breath, starts counting from 1 to 20 and ride on the happiest moments in your life. You will see how beautiful and wonderful your life has been. The obstacles that you’re facing now is only momentarily and you will be sailing across the ocean leaving it behind once you’re determined to take on the challenge. Enjoy leaping the hurdles, life is a mixture of ups and downs. It makes you feels alive. Would you rather sit in front of the tele every single day and wait for your life to end – hell NO with me! All I’m trying to say is, when the BANG in your life came with capital B, find that one thing that can cheer you up and bring a smile to you.

To those who gave up their life in their own hand, may your mind and soul rest in peace. To those who are alive and reading, please do appreciate your life moments and love the people around you. Life is too short to regret living.

Uncommon magic at 09:45 hour: Love your life, love yourself.

June 26, 2007 at 10:42 am 5 comments

Stress

I used to convince myself that I should feel inspired and accept stress as a challenge to move forward in life. This little lie I told myself somehow worked although at times, I do feel the pressures within. I felt that we tend to grow into denying the existence of stress at work as you move higher up the corporate ladder, or as your working experience increases. We tries to display the credibility in handling stress, striving to deliver the expectations from higher management, while the cruel reality in ourself shouts for freedom. You should start asking yourself – do you know when you are stressed out? I’d like to share with you, some of the signs that I did experienced myself which you should watch out for when stress starts creeping into your life:

  • Experience fatigue and feeling sleepy even with enough sleep
  • Working more than 12 hours a day
  • Goes to sleep with work matters spinning in your head
  • Unorganised deadlines delivery
  • Forgetful
  • Anxiety, such as constant reminding yourself that something is missing or it’s never good enough in your deliverables
  • Became more critizing and argumentative in discussion/issues
  • Having low self esteem and in work
  • Muscle ache, headaches/migraine and high blood pressure
  • Eating disorder – either eats more or cutting down your meals
  • Worrying about your work constantly and always caught looking blankly into nothing

If you’re like me, you can try to keep tabs on types of situations/conditions that triggered that stress in you. Getting involved with certain projects, co-operating with a certain colleagues, meeting up with certain client or was it just a personal matter in life that bothers you. Write down in your journal if you must, just do something about it.

Whenever I’m stressed out, a good comedy always cracked me out of my grumpiest moment. Walking alone while buried in my MP3 player, playing tunes I loved does the trick for me too. Another method that I find it working for me was to wake up earlier in the morning and spend time with myself to think about what’s going on in life. Think of positive matters, it helps to lift your spirits up and kicks start your day with a smile.

Uncommon magic at 08:30 hour: Recognizing one’s fear and finding way to overcome the matter.

June 25, 2007 at 9:28 am 2 comments

Sharifah Amani, Stolen.

I’m lazy to write and squeezing my brain to some intelectual writing felt torturing today. I’ve tried to come out with something to write for the whole day and none came out from my freezing brain. As I’m blog hopping – something I really enjoying these days, I stumbled upon this guy called Budiey. What a find for today! It was a local entertainment blog and it’s written in Malay, featuring a wholesome insights of almost every single artistes you can think of. 

It’s even more amazing to find him posted photos of Sharifah Amani, looking gorgeous in her new bald look. Why the title Sharifah Amani, Stolen? I haven’t asked permission to post Sharifah Amani photo that I took from Budiey. I wouldn’t claimed it belongs to me, besides he has got his watermark on the photo. I felt that everyone should see how beautiful Sharifah Amani is in her new look. She reminded me of Bai Ling. The kind of beauty that exudes quality of living goddess. See for yourself.

Sharifah Amani looking gorgeous
She’s beautiful.

Uncommon magic at 23:45 hour: Stealing picture from other blog? I’m not thinking today!

June 21, 2007 at 11:45 pm 7 comments

Life is about Marketing

What is Marketing?
Quoting the definition from Contemporary Marketing Wired (1998) by Boone and Kurtz, Dryden Press:

Marketing is the process of planning and executing the conception,
pricing, promotion, and distribution of ideas, goods, services,
organizations, and events to create and maintain relationships that
will satisfy individual and organizational objectives.

Essentially, Marketing is as simple as a mean to promote anything/everything that you to know about. I relate my life events so far to Marketing because I found myself deeply into this subject of late and while I’m at it, it dawned to me that it is indeed about Marketing in my everyday life. I’ll let you have the judgement.

My Kindergarden
It was about learning to make friends and blending into the crowd. I may not realize this at that very moment, but I do remember the times when I do want to take parts in every activities available, giving the impression to teachers that I’m smart and letting them know I had great guardian that loved me like no tomorrow. It is all about marketing myself as a kid that is likeable by everybody, one that people can refer to as an example – the result? A self fulfilling prophecy that you know you did well and get to misbehaved at times, knowing that I will get over it in no time. I’ve got objective, and I’ve got result – that’s Marketing.

My College
I grow up to be a more responsible person. One who knows my responsibility in the family and toeing along the line drawn. I work hard for my tuition fees back then, taking words that felt life a knife slicing down your heart, bleeding silently. I can never be the one with his fashion sense up and running. I can never be the one scoring high in my class. I’m no programming wizard my Dad always wished I am. I’ll never get to be the chef cooking up a storm and getting rave reviews all over national tele. Cruel and harsh reality. There’s no one to blame. Past experiences mould me to be a better person that I am today. I come to understand the fact that my Marketing cohesion will never succeed back then, no matter how I wished I had try. I’m hold back by too many variables that I’m not capable of changing. How does Marketing come in? I have vision and ambition, the time is not right and there’s higher authority controlling the outcome. Marketing does not succeed unless you are capable of overwriting these obstacles at the right time and convince decision makers to support your actions.

My First Job
I still remember how ecstatic I am during the last paper of my 2 years Diploma programme. I can’t wait to get out of college, get out of my house and head on to a whole new working world. Study seems so daunting at that time only to understand at later stage that getting a job is even worst. I do not read the news nor do I follow the world events at that time. You won’t believe me if I tell you that I do not know of the Asean Economy Crisis until I came out and got my first job. It was the recovery period at that time and I have little understanding of the impact. That explains on the difficulty I faced with unsuccessful interviews for a good 2 months. No matter how hard I tried to sell myself, it doesn’t work as everyone is looking for cheap labour at top notch quality and packed with experiences while I’m as fresh as your morning glory, with zero knowledge of most of the work I’m applying for. No matter how hard sell you are, you will not succeed when there’s no demand.

Uncommon magic at 08:00: Looking at life events from a different perspective. There’s a lot of angle in one good photograph, you need to find which one you like best.

June 20, 2007 at 8:36 am 3 comments

The Stench vs. The Jam

It was 19:00 hour and I’m on my way home in Ampang Line LRT (previously known as STAR Line LRT). Having just came out from a human stuffed Monorail, it can’t be any worst than boarding an LRT that looked almost like Hogwart Express – only this one doesn’t stop at Platform 5 3/4, it was packed with students. To further add to my horrified ride home – there’s no Draco Malfoy mine you; the already humid air quickly filled up with stench of sweats, unmistakenly from the students on board. There is this secondary school’s girl behind me, munching happily on her prawn crackers while carrying a conversation with a friend, forced me to pause my breathing occassionaly along the journey as the air are unbearable. Thank god I have to put up with the situation for the distance of 3 stations only.

This is the typical scenario that we, the Klang Valley residents or anyone who’s taking the public transport to and back from work are facing everyday. Our government goes on to preach for us to choose public transport such as buses, train and monorail over private owned car, reassurring the public that they are doing everything possible to improve the system. My question, can you withstand such air abuse everyday? I know there are other variables that is so much more important than this, but air abuse such as this can’t be changed by the government. It is merely an individual choice. Of course, Rapid KL could do better with their air conditioning but what about people who sweats profusely or rather like my case today, students filled compartments that stinks!

I’d to say that it is indeed a bad time to go home today. I simply forgot the fact that 19:00 hour is still the “rush hour”, thus my meeting with such an unfortunate encounter. What can I say, I have been beating the bushes to find more time back into my life lately in an attempt to cover time losses in my daily work routine. The choice for me is very straight-forward, I would still choose public transport over driving my own car to and back from work. It simply does not do justice to compensate the time and effort needed behind the wheels in the horrifying traffic every morning compared to momentarily breathing air that renders my face green.

The train station is located just a stone throw across my block and the inter-change station to the Monorail was just a few steps. Besides, my office is only 2 blocks away from the Monorail station. Anyone in their sane mind will not choose to drive into KL over taking the train, it is only a matter of choosing the right time to get on and off the train. I choose the wrong time to go home today, my bad. I figure, sometimes, choices made in our life comes from within one self. Somethings that is happening or has happened doesn’t have to be wrong or incorrect. Simply because we picked the wrong voice in a noisy crowd, we made the assumptions that’s that. Take your time to filter the noises and made your own decision. You will become what you think of, and you believe what you want to believe. Period.

Uncommon magic at 21:00 hour: Pay attention to time. Wrong timing can land you on really unpleasant situation.

June 19, 2007 at 9:39 pm 2 comments

The Wonderwall

It was an extremely early start for me today. I’m sitting in front of my laptop with my cup of coffee by 4:30 AM. It’s a week start where I’ll try to introduce more productive schedule for myself after discovering Zen Habits over the weekend. Write, Leo of Zen Habits share with his readers insights of his thought on how one should make good use of their time, in today’s fast paced world.

I’ve got a good reason to get up early. First of all, I intended to read up on Project Management; a topic I’d like to delved into and had put aside for sometime. Secondly, I’m finding a topic to write for today’s post. It got to be the drastic change that I put into my sleeping pattern, my brain is as dry as a bone – it’s not working at all. I’m staring blankly into my screen, scrolling down my mailbox, toggling between my checking my blog stats, and scanning headlines of my Google Reader RSS Feeds. Lesson of the day – do not introduce a drastic change into your sleeping hours, it does not yield the result you wished for. I had successfully get myself up by 6:00 AM for the past 2 weeks, another initiative that I find myself is capable of, and I’d more time to accomplished thing I wished to- such as blogging seriously. I should try instead to reduce my sleeping hour until my body get adjusted to the new clocking mechanism – to wake up by 4:30 AM.

Dry Moat and fort wall at Castillo

How does today’s topic come about? Due to my incapibilities to put up myself to get some task done despite waking up at such an hour, I decided to get a nap for 30 minutes on my sofa. That is when I got a deep rest and within that short period I got myself into a dream. I’m dreaming of chasing a boy skiing on his snow board, descending a hill in an unknown heavily snowed territory, one that depicting a castle of some sort. I was there chasing him, shouting him to stop only to know that within split seconds, my chase will end up in a huge fort’s wall. To my suprise the boy took a huge leap, bending down to hold on tight on his snow board, got up high in the sky and jumped over the wall. Bewildered by his escape, I followed suit and took a leap but I was stucked, standing on the wall instead. The boy looked back at me with a huge grin painted on his face and quickly took off in victorious screams. I on the other hand, stands still on the wall, looking doubtful of my life at that very odd moment. People are rushing out, probably because of the chasing and the screams – there’s 2 of them. I can’t see who are they, but they were there to calm me. Asking me to take my time and get on to the other end of the wall, where there’s a ladder, one that I could use to get down. I woke up that very moment to find that I have to take my shower and prepare myself for work, aiming to beat the morning rush hour train ride.

That is when I decided to write about Wonderwall. According to dream interpretation, dreaming of a wall such as mine signifies obstables I had in life, on that I will get over in later stage as I’m standing in between walls, feeling doubtful and fear. Come to think about it, there is truth about the meaning of the dream. Many times too often, everyone do have obstables that they need to oversome. We need to identify each of them, be truth to yourself of what needed change and work towards obtaining the best possible result. I’m making some changes to my life, I know what need to be done, and I’m working hard towards it.

I hope you do find your insights today, have a great start of the week, and do not get the Monday Blues Symptom eats up too much of your time. Time is money and money is essential. It may not be the most important thing in live, but it can certainly get you many of the important things in live.

Uncommon magic at 08:00 hour: Recognising my fear and changes I need in life. Found dreams to be a tool to access your life milestone, to a certain extends.

June 18, 2007 at 8:33 am 2 comments

Happy Father’s Day

It was a happy day. Dad were grinning and suprised upon seeing me with the present I got him. Mum were asking, “Samsung? Amende tu (What’s that)?”. Dad thought it was a DVD Player. I told him it’s a Glossy Black Finishes Samsung 17″ LCD Monitor, one that he’d like to own very long time ago but never got the wit to depart with his 600 bucks. I get to spent time with my old man over lunch, do some light shopping and fumbling to fix the stand of the new monitor. Mum was delighted to see both of us trying so hard to push in the monitor slot into it’s stand for a good damn half an hour. Dad did the trick, somehow he managed to assemble the stand and he’s as happy as a clam.

Samsung LCD Monitor
(Image derived from Samsung Malaysia)

What’s your Father’s Day like? I hope you do take some time to call your Dad if you’re not with him today. Simply listening to your voice asking his well being does wonder, although he will never said it out loud. All he care about was to know that his children do concerns of his existence. Every so often, we hear that you should never only appreciate your Dad on Father’s Day. That is very true and I truly behold to that. It is just a nice gesture that you took some extra effort to remember that today is slightly special for him.

I’d say I did pretty well for my Father’s Day. I know my Dad is very happy with what I had for him. It’s great to have the time to spend with him, albeit it’s only half a day. I here wishes all fathers in the world, a very Happy Father’s Day.

Uncommon magic at 19:25 hour: Appreciate your parents today, you’ll never know what tomorrow will become.

June 17, 2007 at 7:32 pm Leave a comment

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